Welp, it's official. Gay marriage in NC is even more illegal-er. In fact, any kind of domestic situation you got going on is illegal, if it is anything other than good old one-man/one-woman action. And just in the nick of time. For we all know it was those freaking queeny bridezillas working at Enron, too busy planning their big gay wedding and not paying enough attention to doing their jobs, that brought down the economy. No? Okay then. Lesbians on a house-flipping spree that caused the mortgage crisis? No? Drag queen teachers gaying up all the kids and causing them to fail end of grade testing? Still no?
So.....why was this important???
Certainly, I understand the argument from a morality stance. What little I have gleaned from the intermittent church going I have done in my life, coupled with my extensive research in Henry's Precious Moments Picture Bible, seems to point me in the direction of Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve. Biblical scholar I am not, but my own personal experiences have shown me that marriage is a divine institution that God is still very much invested in. I care not to quote scripture, as I know none. And also because I am aware that for every scripture I could find seeming to denounce homosexuality, I could also find one denouncing polyester or popcorn shrimp or not sitting in a tent in the backyard for a week while I shed uterine lining. Clearly we chose to abandon that last one when someone realized no one would be watching the kids or cooking dinner for a whole week, and well just forget all that!
My personal belief about marriage doesn't center on some quote out of the Good Book. It centers on personal experience, the way God has worked in my life and in my own marriage. God has made me a believer in the roles of man and woman in a traditional marriage: that a husband should love his bride the way Christ loved the church. That a woman should honor her husband the way the church honors Christ. This plan, this design, the way it all works together towards His goal for our lives, is why I believe that marriage is a divine institution ordained by God. I may not know much about religion, but on this point I am steadfast.
And that plan is so important. For James to love me even as Christ loves the church...me, that constantly loses my keys, runs down the battery in his laptop right before he goes to work, gets angry at him for no good reason. Me that disappoints him, that hurts him, that lets him down. He loves me anyway, and for this I honor him. Putting up with me, let alone LOVING me, is no easy feat. But it is what we were created to do.
So this, my belief in the sanctity of marriage, is why I cry like a newborn baby at weddings. It is a powerful thing to stand in the presence of God as you and your beloved enter into a holy covenant with Him. It's why I don't get other types of marriages. Atheists who get married, people from different religions who get married, people who write their own vows, etc. Not in a you-will-burn-in-fiery-pit kind of way. More like when one of your friends shares their love of grilled octopus, or when you hear about new mothers eating their placentas. If thats what you're into, that's cool, but thats just not my thing. There are a lot of other things I don't get in this life. But that's okay, because the beautiful thing about it is that no one cares what I think. Your personal journey is just that--personal. So what if one of us is getting this whole marriage thing wrong? So what if I really should've skipped on the surf and turf, or avoided that wool cotton blend? How do we know if any of us has it right?
This belief is also precisely why I think the government has no jurisdiction when it comes to marriage. Marriage is a God thing, not a government thing. Uncle Sam doesn't care if I've been baptized or if I've circumcised my children or if I went to church last Sunday. Hell, Uncle Sam doesn't even review my wedding vows for appropriate God-ishness or require me to get married in a place of worship. But all of a sudden it's a huge freaking deal to be gay because GAY MARRIED PEOPLE ARE THE ROOT OF ALL EVIL!!! I don't think so, Tim. God could've had creation full of loving, obedient children, but instead chose to grant us free will. Likewise, we should not attempt to legislate others into our way of thinking.
And for those that welcome the government's intervention into personal matters, I hope you always agree with the ones that are in charge. It is a very slippery slope.
But even if I'm wrong, even if gay marriage is something that needs to be addressed...is now the appropriate time? We have people out of work, seniors struggling to make ends meet, teachers who barely earn a living wage, and children getting the brunt of it all? You mean to tell me, NC legislators, that this is the best you could do? This is where your energy was best spent? Making something that was already illegal even more illegal-er? But perhaps you knew what you were doing, really. Never have I seen such a frenzy, never have I seen more people giving a shit, than now. Maybe this is all some way of getting us to forget about all the ways you have failed us, by hitting a hot button you know we can't resist. Indeed, this very post is evidence that it worked. You got us good.
And I hope you are right. Because giving a shit is good. Perhaps this momentum can continue. Perhaps the voices of my generation and the ones behind me, the ones who want to see a change but felt too hopeless to even start, can continue to rise. We can challenge the amendment in court. We can vote you out of office. We can replace you.
But first, how about a constitutional amendment to ban slow drivers in the passing lane? Those guys are real a-holes.